In my early 20s I started getting really curious about what makes “a magical evening” so magical. This could be pertain to anything really: dinner with friends, a night at the bar, a party or a wedding. I clearly remember in the morning thinking “that was such an incredible night...let’s do that again!” But when you try to recreate the situation, things fall flat. Why is that? Why can’t you recreate the feelings from a specific time? You can be in the same place, in the same spot, with the same people, at the same time of day and instead of sparks flying, you just want to go home.
This plays out time and time again with weddings and other events.
In my last blog post I talked about how important it is to feel the love at a wedding if you want guests to leave feeling like they caught the bug. In this post I’m going to give you a few tips for encouraging that love energy in a wedding.
When I design an event, I am always cautious about duplicating another successful event. Just taking vendors and ideas from one incredible event and trying to impose that onto the guests of another event isn’t going to work.
First, the couple is essential. I like to find out what elements make a night magical for the bride and groom. Do they like to dance? Do they like long dinners? Or maybe they’re happiest on the couch with a bunch of friends eating pizza? Whatever it is, follow that. When the couple doesn’t feel comfortable in the setting and would rather go home themselves, all the guests will take it upon themselves to hit the road early.
Simply put, don’t designate most of the night to dancing if the couple hates dancing. Don’t plan an elegant five course meal if the couple only wants BBQ. Get my drift?
When the couple is happy and comfortable, then they start sharing their happiness with guests. They kiss one another. They stay next to one another. They want to hug all of their friends and family. And soon, everyone wants to hug everyone!
Also, giving the couple and other couples opportunities to be together is key. A few extra slow songs. Low lighting. Small vignettes that encourage face to face conversation (not side by side, like at a round banquet table).
I also like to space out the formalities throughout the night. If the couple does keep getting pulled away from one another, those formalities ensure that the couple has a reason to come back together every hour or so.
Now, to be completely transparent, you can’t actually MAKE someone feel something they don’t want to feel. There will always be a guest or two that just isn’t taking the bait, and isn’t in the right headspace. But I firmly believe that if specific intention is put into each decision of the wedding, that magic can happen.